• Release year: 1982
• Director: Steve Miner.
• Producer: Frank Mancuso Jr.
• Screenplay by: Martin Kitrosser and Carol Watson.
• Cinematography by: Gerald Feil.
• Music by: Harry Manfredini.

Shotgun Commentary: a nice slasher for an afternoon of hate-watching.

Review

Not gonna lie, Friday the 13th Part III is pretty much the same thing again. Only this time at least they bothered changing the circumstances. No more summer camps or counsellors for the third instalment of the franchise!

Instead, say hello to the horror classic ‘cabin in the woods’ situation. Following Evil Dead’s (1981) lead, the film gets a bunch of teens who go to a cabin near Crystal Lake where, instead of a human-skin-bound book, they will have a visit from our ol’ pal Jason (Richard Brooker).

From bad to worse

When a sequel that comes out only one year after the previous film, and two after the first instalment, does it need a recap of over six minutes? It makes you wonder about the state of society in the 80s, were drugs that much of a problem? How hard is it to remember a slasher that has essentially been told twice with barely different endings in the span of two years?

Furthermore, do you actually need to be reminded of a scene that will have absolutely no impact on the movie that you are about to watch? The only logical explanation is that a lot of money went into the making of that scene, and they wanted to squeeze the most out of it. Still, that intro is but a painful reminder of a film that should’ve never happened.

Evil Dead has been mentioned before, however, it is Cabin in the Woods (2011) that full-on embodies this film’s story. From the creep who might as well have been a death sign, to the ridiculous decisions made by the characters, the 2011 horror comedy feels like what this feature should’ve been. Sadly, it couldn’t be further from it. The lack of a scientific explanation to most of what takes place during the film including everyone’s behaviour and choices merely manages to elevate this piece into a fun hate-watch experience or a cinematic drinking game. Hardly a relevant piece in the history of horror in any case.

Bad boys and villains

This is the film where you miss Jason the most during the first half of footage. That is mainly caused by two topics that are central in the narrative and haven’t aged so well: sexism and fatphobia. When the most decent and dateable guy of the film is the serial killer, you might need to double-check your script. If you are trying to get over your constant fangirling over villains, this is NOT the movie to so. Personally, this writer had to remind herself that you are not actually supposed to root for the butcher. Sadly, like it happened with Trap (2024), the alternative is so deficient that you pretty much have no other choice.

Let’s start with Rick (Paul Kratka). He is a country boy whose presentation consists of hiding inside the cabin and grabbing the final girl by the neck the minute she steps in, crashing her against the wall and kissing her without her consent. Now, one can be kinky, but there is a very clear difference between kink and assault. A difference that wasn’t taught at Rick’s school.

Additionally, Rick spends the whole film psychologically abusing final girl Chris (Dana Kimmell) to get in her pants. From charming, definitely non-threatening sentences such as “there’s only so many cold showers I can take”, to kind, constant reminders of the fact that he could be having sex with another girl but chose her, his behaviour will make you pray for Jason to put you out of your misery.

Fatphobia and nonsense

The other male characters are not far behind. Jason excluded, they all treat women like they are small children who should be ordered around, groping them like they are fruit at the market, and ignoring them when they see fit to feel more manly. Of course, one of the slimiest characters had to be Shelly (Larry Zerner), the chubby boy of the bunch. As such, he’s portrayed as a greasy try-hard to tries to compensate his physical appearance by… being a prick?

Apparently, according to his flawless logic, being annoying and disrespectful is the only way he can “get a girl” despite his physique. The assumption that he should have problems with girls because of his physical appearance is not only sexist in the way it assumes women are all superficial, but also fatphobic in its assumption that just because you don’t have a six-pack, you are unlovable. Of course, he spends most of his time eating or making misogynistic comments, as one would expect from a film like this. But apparently the latter has nothing to do with his solitude.

Influencers and incels

However, the misogynistic bit answers to a terrifyingly similar to the wave of misogyny that is taking place right now. The mentality of men who, because they are insecure, assume women won’t love them and, with a bit of encouragement from toxic influencers, end up despising a fictional idea of women that exists only in their heads. It is sad that such a retrograde mentality is still a thing nowadays. Then again, fatphobia is still all the rage, so it shouldn’t come as a surprise.

All in all, Friday the 13th Part III showcases the worst of society and then gives you the chance to witness its bloody slaughter like some sort of social toxicity purge. It is a very satisfying narrative in which the bad guy doesn’t look so bad after all. It is low-budget and nonsensical, with over-the-top acting and litres of splattered blood. Big recommend for a slasher movie night.

Advice to take from this movie:

• If your BBF makes you share a hammock in a cabin full of rooms, it’s time to find new friends.
• Sometimes a good killing spree is all you need to lift your mood.
• If a guy hits you in the face with a yo-yo on purpose, and he’s not eating said yo-yo three seconds later, shame on you.

What’s your take? Have you watched Friday the 13th: Part III? Don’t hesitate to let me know your thoughts in the comments section below, or leave a message in my contact page! For more reviews and cinema-related articles, check out the rest of my blog! 😀