• Release year: 2023
• Director: Chloe Barreau.
• Producers: Mario di Fabio, Leonardo Godano and Matteo Rovere.
• Screenplay by: Chloe Barreau, Marco Perez and Giulia Sbernini.
• Cinematography by: Andres Arce Maldonado.
• Music by: Andrea Moscianese.

Shotgun Commentary: a nice reminder of just how common cheating is, and how important it is to keep loving, even if the last person you loved hurt you.

Review

Fragments of a Life Loved is an account of Chloé Barreau’s love life. She has been recording every relationship she’s had, and now puts her recoding in perspective with her ex-lover’s memories of their relationship in order to share her view of love. Themes like memory, trust, loyalty, intimacy and homophobia reign supreme in Barreau’s essay about love.

You can watch this documentary in the upcoming week, in the 3rd Cinecittà Italian Doc Season!

X and Y

It is hard to avoid comparing the behaviour of men and women, in particular, straight men versus gay men and women. It is funny how the straight males’ plan of action when they grow disinterested in a relationship is to ignore it until the problem goes away on its own.

All the women take some kind of action to get closure and move on, but the men seem very comfortable ignoring someone until they eventually go away. Do they not respect the other person enough to give her a decent breakup, or do they just lack the guts to do so? Are they…afraid of women?

Granted, the sample isn’t big enough to make a statistic out of it, but it is a curious coincidence for sure. Does it have anything to do with the media’s portrayal of girls turning into monsters when they develop into women?

The big no-no

Another big theme in the documentary is cheating. The fact that most relationships include, or ended because of, cheating puts the love aspect into perspective. Can a cheater actually love their partner and cheat on them? What is love anyway?

One would think that loving someone includes having enough respect for them to not break their trust. How can a person who has cheated on most of their partners feel entitled to say anything about love, much less do a whole film? Well, this feature is proof that doing this is not only possible, but it also offers a different perspective on love.

What appears to be the actions of a coward (you lose interest and instead of breaking up you cheat), is regarded by her ex-partners without hatred or anger. Instead, they all justify and understand those actions. Sometimes, there’s even remorse over not being what Barreau needed.

Forgiving is healing (?)

If these feelings are true and not just a pitiful way to present oneself as the bigger person, they open the meaning of sentimental love. Love in retrospective, a love that is big enough to forget about the bad and understand it through the lens of the good.

Barreau’s ex-partners are kind and understanding to the point of delusion at times, which invites the question: just how much does love actually blind us? Sure, with time everything seems less horrible and dramatic, you get the chance to reflect and accept, and, most of all, the feelings die down. The love is not as strong, and the hatred follows suit.

It might also be a cultural thing, the French and the Italian have certain preconceptions about love that not all Europeans understand. Some of the ex-partners even talked about cheating as a natural phase of a relationship. Whatever it is, the documentary certainly opens eyes and challenges ideals.

The infinity of denial

Lastly, it is important to touch upon a subject that is very lightly mentioned, but incredibly relevant: homophobia. This huge issue is still very much relevant. Sadly, a lot of people are still sick with this prejudice and, while the narrative mentions the problems that gay people had to face in Italy and France, it doesn’t acknowledge the elephant in the room, Barreau’s homophobia.

Her constant denial of her sexual orientation, along with lying to every woman she was with about her previous lesbian experiences, paint her as a queer woman who is afraid of lesbians, afraid of showing who she is, even while she is having sexual relationships with other women.

All in all, Fragments of a Life Loved presents a very complex take on love, one that admits cheating as normal while denying the obvious. The strange standards that people set in order to be comfortable with who they are, including lying to oneself and others, will always be complicated to understand. Nevertheless, it is always enlightening and kinda fun to try.

Advice to take from this movie:

• It is always the guy who acts the coolest while talking about an ex-partner, the one who was more in love with them.
• Did Barreau film all her relationships with the idea of making a project about love already in her mind? If so, did this affect the way she behaved during her relationships?
• How can someone just be OK with a partner cheating on them? When did this become a thing?

What’s your take? Have you watched Fragments of a Life Loved? What do you think of their takes on the subject? Don’t hesitate to let me know your thoughts in the comments section below, or leave a message in my contact page! For more reviews and cinema-related articles, check out the rest of my blog! 😀